Matt’s News – Thursday 26 November 2020

Watch Matt’s News – Thursday 26 Nov 2020

Taking a satirical look at the news making the headlines….

News covered in todays show:

Meghan Markle’s Sudden Realisation after Divorce

Meghan Markle took time to process miscarriage

Noel Fielding walks off GBBO

Prince Andrew Vocal over Prince Charles being King

Extra Extra – Is Prince Charles a paedophile too?

Utah Monolith Mystery

Jupiter and Saturn line up


Revisiting a classic Guerrilla Democracy News article first published on Sunday 13 January 2013.

Queen Elizabeth II, Monarch of Great Britain and the Common Wealth, has today been arrested for High Treason against the British People.

Following the revelations of Jimmy Savile’s perverted past, police swooped upon Buckingham Palace and arrested her Majesty and her husband Prince Philip. Further police raids were conducted at Clarence House, where Prince Charles was also arrested and taken to Cannon Row Police Station for questioning.

Mr Adrian Leppard , the Metropolitan Police Commissioner for London confirmed that compelling evidence revealed by the blogger Christopher D Spivey, lead the police to conduct dawn raids across various Royal Palaces including Sandringham Palace and Balmoral Palace in Scotland.

He says “Evidence has come to light which directly implicates her Majesty and her husband Prince Philip and her children with Satanic rituals involving young children.”

Following the Sunday Express revelations that the Royal’s close friend Jimmy Savile conducted Satanic rituals in attendance with other unspecified persons, prompted a number of specific allegations being reported to police.

Queen Elizabeth Windsor, who’s real family name is Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, has been revealed to be an imposter to the British Crown.

A descendent of a Belgium Royal dynasty called the House of Wettin, its been alleged that the true Royal blood-line, leading down from the renowned King Arthur of folk-lore, has been fraudulently covered up to allow the Wettin Royal Dynasty to fraudulently claim the British throne.

Queen Elizabeth who heads Britain’s most secretive family, has been accused of being a compulsive adulterer. Following seized love letters revealing that in fact Prince Andrew’s real father to be Lord Porchester and Prince Edward’s real father to be Baron Patrick Plunket.

Her children certainly follow in her immoral footsteps, revealing that the rumours are true that Major James Hewitt is indeed Prince Harry’s father and that Princess Zara Philip’s real father is Princess Anne’s secret lover, Sgt Peter Cross.

The charges of High Treason refer to the specific charge that in 1972, she knowingly allowed the corrupt paedophile Prime Minister, Edward Heath to sign away the British people’s sovereignty to her ancestral Royal Dynasties of Europe.

The Queen can technically be hanged for her crimes, as the crime of High Treason in British Law still carries the death penalty.

Sources inside Scotland Yard say the Queen remains stubbornly silent, as she has done so throughout this unfolding scandal.

She is being held indefinitely under anti-terrorism laws and its expected that further charges of Conspiracy to Murder are also being prepared against her following the release of Keith Allen’s documentary ‘Unlawful Killing’ which points to a cover-up of Princess Diana’s murder and subsequent inquest.

Specific charges of murder have already been charged against Prince Philip and Prince Charles, following the discovery of a hand-written letter by Princess Diana which states that Prince Charles is planning to kill her in a car accident.

Police are also investigating the apparent murder of a 15 year of Eastern European girl who’s dead body was found on the Sandringham ground on New Year’s day 2012. Its believed that the girl escaped a Satanic ritual being conducted as a New Year’s celebration within the Palace, and died from hypothermia while hiding for her life in a ditch outside the palace grounds.

The arrests have caused shock and disbelief throughout the Nation. Demonstrations outside Buckingham Palace have seen tens of thousands of people coming out and venting their angry.

Armed police were forced to open fire on the crowd as they pushed against the palace gates.

Further arrests are expected, including close friends of the Royal family such as Rolf Harris, Cliff Richard and ex politicians, namely Gordon Brown and Tony Blair.

Matt Taylor the leader of the SOS Party, and recognised by many as the next Prime Minister of Great Britain says “The collapse of the British Establishment is happening all around us. This is the end we have all been waiting for.”

A spokesman for the Windsor family says “Her Majesty fervently denies all charges against her and her children.”

David Icke has also released a statement saying “I told you so…..”

Disclaimer: This story is fake and is meant for entertainment purposes only. (After all, Dark Forces are at work and no-one wants to meet with an unfortunate accident or to commit suicide)

Top 10 Alternative Royal Scandals

Following on from The 50 Biggest Royal Scandals of all Time; as published in the royal publication of choice, ‘Woman’s Day;’ here are the Top 10 Alternative Royal Scandals of the Windsor’s.

Top 10 Alternative Royal Scandals
Top 10 Alternative Royal Scandals

1. Prince Charles is a Paedophile!

Likely to bring the Royal Windsor family to an end; speculation has been immense in the alternative media that Prince Charles is a paedophile.

With life-long friendships with a number of known paedophiles, including Jimmy Saville and Peter Ball; Prince Charles is believed to have been abused as a child himself, by his Uncle Lord Mountbatten and his father, Prince Philip.

Analysis of his recent letter to the Child Abuse Inquiry, reveals that yes indeed; Prince Charles has a case to answer.

2. The Queen is a member of the Ninth Circle Satanic Cult

Kevin Annett, a Canadian priest and Secretary of the International Tribunal into Crimes of Church and State (ITCCS), has publicly declared to the world in a Youtube video that Senior Ninth Circle members include Pope’s Francis and Benedict, Archbishop of Canterbury Justin Welby, two British High Court judges, at least one Catholic bishop in Canada, senior government ministers in Belgium and England, and members of the British, Dutch and Belgian royal families; routinely conduct rituals involving the routine rape, torture and murder of children and newborn babies.

In what can only be described as the most serious allegation to be made against any British Monarch in history, Kevin Annett has blown open the veil of secrecy that hides horrific crimes against humanity.

Being named as members of a satanic cult is one allegation too far.

Any person of any class would be asked to defend themselves. Regardless whether a royal or a serf, an allegation of rape, torture and the murder of children and newborn babies, must be answered.

Read more:

3. The Queen is Named as Part of an International Paedophile Ring

4. Meghan is Faking her pregnancy

5. Prince William has a Body Double

5. Princess Diana wasn’t real

According to Britain’s most controversial alternative writer, Chris Spivey; Princess Diana was a fictional character created by the Windsor’s for their own nefarious reasons.

In his ground-breaking article ‘Night of the Living Dead,’ he contends that not only Princess Diana and Dodi Al Fayed didn’t die in the infamous car crash in Paris on 31 August 1997, but neither Princess Diana or Dodi Al Fayed even exist.

6. Princes Charles is Gay

charles gay2

Splashed across the US tabloids, but kept secret from the British Press, “Prince Charles’ “secret gay life has been blown wide open by shocking photos of the love-sick royal in a sizzling lip-lock with his toy boy beau!”

7. The Queen is Dead

Buckingham Palace once issued a press release stating that Queen Elizabeth died in her sleep .

The official statement, released by the Queen’s press secretary at the request of Prince Charles, states that Queen Elizabeth passed away in her sleep at Sandringham House after becoming “increasingly frail in recent weeks following her bad cough and chest infection over Christmas.

Buckingham Palace Retracted Queen Elizabeth Death Announcement; and is rumoured to have replaced the Queen with either a clone or a body-body.

8. The Queen Order the Assassination of Princess Diana

Whether Princess Diana was real or just a fictional character as Chris Spivey contends; the Alternative Media has asked the question; DId the Queen Assassinate Diana?

9. The Queen’s father is really Winston Churchill

Rebel royal insider Greg Hallet from New Zealand, claims that not only is Winston Churchill the biological father of Queen Elizabeth II, and King Juan Carlos I of Spain is also Princes William’s biological father.

10. The Queen is Guilty of Manslaughter

This stunning headline has been inferred from a report published by the Office of the Children’s Commissioner for England, about the economic impact on children.

It found that the Government’s austerity measures will negativity impact on 600,000 of the nation’s poorest kids.

The report makes no bones about it, ‘Families with children in the poorest 10% of the population are losing an average of £40 per week.’

‘More children are entering poverty, ultimately, that means more children going without the basics because their parents and carers cannot afford them.’

Children will inevitably die. Children will starve to death and will be abandoned to the State.



fuck you icke